My Tree of Life

The seed of this project

My Tree of Life
Around 1980, I was called upon by my then-husband to help him come up with a fundraising concept, through an ad posted at our alma matter, the Boston Museum School. It was for the New England Sinai Medical Center. They had a nice lobby and they knew they wanted a fundraising sculpture of some kind. My then-husband, a very talented sculptor from India, knew little of the Jewish culture. Though a wasp from Connecticut, I had many Jewish friends growing up (I always felt cared for and welcome - plus the food was always better at their house!) and I was interested in the Kaballah from an early age. I remembered being intrigued with the Tree of Life from the mystical books I cherished, so I suggested to my husband that he propose a metal sculpture of a tree adorned with engraved leaves of donors.

The administration at the hospital liked our concept and my husband won the bid. The only problem was, he procrastinated on the project for years! He kept buying tools to make the project and the checks had cleared long since, but the tree languished on the floor of our garage, dormant, season after season. My high hopes for the project went from encouragement to prodding, then nagging, then outright worry - this project was going nowhere and we had a contractual obligation!

After 5 years, two babies, a foreclosing house, and despite lots of hard work on my part (but not his) I realized that the marriage was a disastrous mistake. By the time things came crashing down the sculpture had been started but it was far from finished. Now a single parent of 2 very young children, I felt bound to complete and install the sculpture, which I did. The very patient hospital was happy with the sculpture and probably never really knew the story behind it.

Eventually I regrouped and resettled my children and myself into an apartment and worked two jobs to keep things going. It was very difficult to work (I am a graphic artist), maintain my kids and my equilibrium with no support, emotionally or financially, from anyone. I wasn't fortunate to have come from a supportive family, though I didn't feel sorry for myself because I was a tryer and a survivor! One day, I received phone call from a lady who worked at another Jewish hospital in Boston. She saw me up on the ladder affixing the leaves and got my name and number because she wanted a sculpture for their lobby! It turned out beautifully and I took a photo of it to remind myself that good things come to those who try. Eventually!

In the summer of 2008, twenty eight years later, I received a phone call from New England Sinai Hospital. They had finally run out of leaves. I arranged to have more made for them and shipped them, though a few fell out of the box and hid in the back of my car. By now I was and am very happily involved with a wonderful Jewish man with three sisters. Last December there was a family get-together because one of them, Sandy, was being honored with the Tree of Life Award by the Jewish National Fund. The synchronicity of events was not lost on me. I put together a collage of her family using the photo of the sculpture and a leftover leaf. It depicts three generations of their lovely family, many of whom I met for the first time on the day of their mother's yarzheit. It was a very moving experience to witness their grief for their mother, who loved gardenias. Sandy has seven grand children, including triplets, represented by gardenias in the collage.

We all have a tree of life - some are magnificently straight and tall, some are delicate wisps, some stand alone, some are in groves or forests, some are cut down into splinters, and some are just plain rotten! But life's imperative insists that the fruit and the seeds they bear have their time to grow if at all possible, however their environment happens to shape their destiny. They are all remarkable in their own way, since without them, we wouldn't be here.

Barbara Bose